Steve's Steps To Being More People Friendly Step 3

So let's review....we have Decided to be more people friendly. In order to be more people friendly, there is a great deal of Understanding that needs to take place. Now what?

STEP THREE: HEART ALIGNMENT

I often tell people if they want to make the biggest difference, impact, impression, etc. to the people that they encounter in life, they must first start with heart. All too often, we let our brains do all the heavy lifting and our mind sometimes has a tendency to run you in a direction that isn't necessarily congruent with a people friendly outcome.

We have all done it. We meet someone and immediately we let the brain take over and start analyzing. We subconsciously start judging the book by the cover. Is this person someone that can help me? Is this person someone that wants to take advantage of me? Is this person worth spending any time with what-so-ever? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah (as my friend Terri would say!).

The moment we let this happen it's game over! Trust me. No matter what your outter personality might be saying, or what you communicate, people can and will detect you are not being genuine. For some of us we call it the BS meter!

People friendly people don't let their brain and by extension their mind be the only thing that leads them. Everything they do in life, every single interaction is done with heart first. Whether that's talking to a co-worker, a friend or a complete stranger, they don't judge the person and they allow their actions, their body language and even their words to be more heart focused.

Isn't that approach a bit naive? Doesn't that mean I am going to open myself up to being taken advantage of?

Something amazing happens when you decide that you are going to lead with your heart. Your "spidey senses" get heightened ten-fold and you become more aware of the people and their intentions. We all know that some people simply aren't worth the investment in time or energy and it's funny but your heart can lead you to that conclusion a lot faster. The problem with our mind is we will play games with ourselves. We will calculate, we will deduct, we will analyze and put people and their intentions through multiple tests and hoops and give multiple chances. All the while, we waste our time, energy and focus. When we lead with our heart and have a people friendly focus at play, we detect who is genuine and who is not, who is worth spending time getting to know and who isn't. So no it isn't naive by any stretch of the imagination....in fact I think it's a more efficient way to live your life.

If you want to be more people friendly, make sure that your heart is in alignment. If you only want to do this because it will make you more likeable and thus more profitable in your business, this won't work because deep down, that's your mind at work...not your heart.

Heart focused people engage because the experience, whatever that is...work, life, standing in line at the movies, etc... is so much more enjoyable when we are enjoying it with someone else. These kinds of people seem to drip with charisma, passion and jest for life. Some of us tend to judge these kinds of people as being "different." Why? Perhaps it's because it's easier to put down than to put out and what a shame.

Find your heart, make sure you are in alignment and get ready for the next step!

Until next time my friends.....

Ripple On!!!!

Steve Harper

P.S. Want to see Heart in action? Come check out the 8 Minute Ripple happening May 4th in Austin, Texas. See www.therippleeffectbook.com for more details.

Steve's Steps To Being More People Friendly Step 2

So you took step one and DECIDED...yes, you want to be more people friendly. Big step! Good job! Now what???


STEP TWO: UNDERSTAND

One of the most difficult things for a lot of us to understand is the world does not revolve around us. The sun will still rise tomorrow morning, gas will continue to cost you an arm and a leg, and people will continue to migrate through their lives regardless of whether you are here or not. Bottom line, in the grand scheme of things....you and I are pretty much irrelevant so long as we continue to believe this great world ceases to exist until our we pop our head out from our tribunal of slumber.

Understand that in order to be more people friendly, you have to understand that there are other people to be friendly to!

Understand that when faced with a challenge, dilemma, request, engagement, situation, desire, etc... that "what's in it for me?" should not be the first and only question that rattles around your dome.

Understand that other people matter. And when examined further....they often matter a whole lot more than our opinions, our agenda, our desires and our wants.

Understand that in order for people to want to be around you, let alone like you, they have to know you.

Understand that anyone, and I do mean anyone, can be liked.

Understand the minute you don't start beginning every single thought, email, letter, story, conversation, analogy, whatever with the word "I" you will have taken a significant step forward in being more people friendly.

One last thing....understand that rejection, especially as you venture outside your comfort zone to open yourself up to vulnerability can be painful. Fortunately it isn't fatal.

Okay, I lied....there is one more last thing....

Understand that being more people friendly can and will open up some amazing opportunities that people that won't take the chances you are about to take will never experience. Life is so much richer when you live it with, through and along side other people.

Until next time....

Ripple On!

Steve Harper
www.therippleeffectbook.com

Steve's Steps To Being More People Friendly

I often have people who have read my book or who have listened to me speak approach me with this question:

"How can I become more people friendly if I am not a people person by nature?"

It is a relevant question, especially for those of us who believe they aren't necessarily people people. Believe it or not, I am very much that way! Quit laughing it is true!

Bottom line, nothing happens in a vacuum! We all have to deal with people on a daily basis. It makes sense to make these interactions as pleasant and rewarding as you possibly can. The biggest challenge is most of us don't know how to do that. Where do you start? That is where I come in.

Over the next few BLOGS, let me let you in on a few secrets that made becoming more people friendly much easier for me and it will for you as well. I promise!

STEP ONE: DECIDE

Seems logical especially for those Maven friends of mine. Decide you are going to become more people friendly. You have to make this decision because without it, all other steps will simply fail unless you have made your mind up and decided to become more people friendly.

Decide that you are tired of eating alone.

Decide that you no longer want to be the only person left at the office when everyone knocks off at the end of the day and heads to happy hour.

Decide that you won't make it pure torture on everyone who needs your help to ask.

Decide that to become more people friendly that there is a certain amount of risk involved and that's okay. It's a calculated risk!

Decide that without a doubt, you associate more pain to being alone than taking a chance to make a connection with another human being.

Decide that smiling isn't more work than frowning.

Decide that by being more people friendly, you will find more opportunities across the board!

Decide the you can do this despite everything your mind is firing off right now to tell you otherwise.

Decide that you can dust off the ol' heart and let it lead for once.

Decide that nothing ventured, nothing gained so what the hell...let's give it a try!

For all of my maven friends out there.....quit analyzing and charting the positives and negatives of each point. Put away the slide rule. Put down the abacus. Take a deep breath and stick that pinky toe in the water.

See....it's not too cold out here. Trust me. We won't let you drown!

Step one is out of the way. Make the decision and stick with it.

Until next time.....Ripple On!!!

Steve