As Featured on Bigg Success Podcast Show

It continues to amaze me how many incredible people I have the sheer pleasure of meeting along the path of my Ripple journey. Thom Singer, friend and fellow BLOGGER of Some Assembly Required connected me to fellow BLOGGER Joshua Hinds with Business Networking Advice. Though I was somewhat connected to Joshua through Twitter we didn't know each other all that well. Thanks to Thom, Joshua tapped me to be interviewed on his BLOG back in March.

Joshua and I hit it off immediately and I have enjoyed reading his BLOG and discovering his other work these past few months. Well to make a long story short, Josh connected me with Mary-Lynn Foster and George Krueger with the Bigg Success Podcast Show and they just interviewed me. The interview can be accessed by clicking here and I hope you will take a listen and check out the other interviews Mary-Lynn and George have recorded. They have some really inspiring and motivational podcasts that I think you will no doubt like!

Anyway I just wanted to thank Thom, Josh, Mary-Lynn and George for this incredible Ripple and their individual support of me and my work.

THANK YOU!!!

Ripple On!!!


Steve

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 8

I realize the title of this series of posts may be somewhat unusual. The word stalker often conjures up negative imagery when you first think of the term. I realize that of course and that is so obviously not my intent. So rest easy my good readers, if you see me at your local Starbucks needn't you worry about my pursuing you like Wylie Coyote does the Road Runner. I am both smart enough to know Acme Dynamite will never have a positive conclusion and a steel anvil to the head at my age would certainly hurt more than I would ever want.

No, I use the word Stalker sort of tongue and cheek to illustrate a point. What I learned from J is connecting with complete strangers is hard work. It takes effort. It takes focused determination. And it takes a lot of time. Some of my greatest connections occurred only after sometimes months and even years of seeing the same old faces over and over again until I was a fixture in one's morning routine of daily scenery. Then and only then would idle chit chat become something more relevant and revealing.

J showed me in all the time we spent that in order for us to make the kinds of connections we wish to have we must first demonstrate our own courage. Stepping outside the box of what society thinks as normal is at times scary. The leap of faith one must take is often only masked with one's ability to handle the rejection of those who are not ready or willing to accept you. For me that was one of the hardest and most discouraging parts of learning to connect. But rest assured whenever I even had the slightest thought of giving up there was J's voice popping into my head and challenging me with the word "Next!" As in next person.

That's the great thing about life....there is always someone else who teed up and ready to connect with you if you are just willing to look. Whether it be the routine of motley characters that venture in and out of any Starbucks in the world on a daily basis or the person sitting next to you the airplane or at the movie theater. People are, without a doubt, there in your path for a reason. The only real question and the one that J asked me is....are you willing to make the effort to discover why?

Some of you may be wondering and many of you have asked if J is a permanent fixture in my life. Unfortunately no. J moved on shortly after teaching me what he had to teach me. A friend to the end, he was and is no doubt truly proud of what I have done with the lessons he took the time to teach me. He is without question proud of what I have accomplished and that I have picked up the reins of his wisdom and added my own and I share it with all who will listen.

The day that I realized he would no longer be joining me for our morning coffee and connection chats a blueberry muffin arrived at my table with a note. It read:

Steve you are destined to do so much in this life. I knew that when I first laid eyes on you. You will undoubtedly make amazing connections that will carry you far and bring many adventures to your life. Some of these connections as you have already experienced, will have an immediate and direct business impact for you and your company. That is good. But never ever forget it's those connections that don't have a business outcome that are the real manna from which you should feast. That is where the good stuff and the great adventures are to be found. But you already know this.

Be well my friend and remember to watch for me, I just may very well pop back up at a table near you someday. Until then I entrust you to go out into the world and make a difference in people's lives. All it takes is a smile and a creative question and you're off to the races.

Cheers,

J


With that I unwrapped my muffin and took a big bite and started to chat with the lady who just had sat down next to me. J would be proud.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 7

Over those next few weeks, J and I met regularly at the Starbucks. He at one table and me at the other. He seemed eager to spend the time sharing with me his philosophies on life and people and demonstrating his incredible ability to start a conversation with just about anyone with little more than a disarming smile, assertive interest and a well placed question.

Though he had promised me an answer to my question about how this connecting stuff was going to help my business, he never readdressed the question at least not directly. Looking back I now know why. It was something that my connection adventures were bound to reveal to me in their own time and they did...one fateful morning.

One of the many people I had managed to connect with over those recent days and months was a man named Bob. An important real estate agent and owner of a growing agency in town. One day Bob sat down next to the tables where J and I were seated and he had a pained look on his face as he reviewed some documents. Sensing he was frustrated, or perhaps angry at something, I asked if he was alright.

"No I am not alright. My office manager hit me we a request from our agents to upgrade all this equipment in our office and I can't make heads nor tails of it," he said as he threw up his hands.

"What kind of equipment are you looking at if you don't mind me asking."

"You name it, she wants it. Our phone system is apparently on it's last leg. The copier hasn't worked well in years and now apparently the printer is broken." He threw down an apparent proposal in frustration.

"I don't know if you know this Bob but I am in that business." His head suddenly popped up. "I would be happy to take a look at what you are being proposed and give an opinion if you want."

"I had no idea Steve. Hmmm of course I would be thrilled if you could help me."

"I don't do anything with phones but I know someone who does. In fact I just recommended them to a big client of mine and they were thrilled. I would be happy to connect you with them as I know they would take good care of you. As for the copier and printer stuff, I can certainly give you the benefit of my own experience and tell you if what we have to offer would be competitive or not. At least give you some things to think about and ask your current vendor." And with that, I rolled up my sleeves and dove in.

The next day J and I met at our usual spot and he remarked about what he had witnessed with Bob. "You looked like you were in your element yesterday and I could tell Bob sure appreciated your help." I smiled but said nothing. "People need to get to know you as a person before they are willing to get to know you are a business person. A lot of people don't get that. I think you do."

I smiled though at the time didn't credit the interaction with Bob as anything more than dumb luck - being at the right place at the right time with the right expertise was I am sure what I was thinking. J somehow magically sensed my self doubt and said, "Kid, trust me. It wasn't dumb luck." His magical psychic powers continued to shock and amaze me.

J leveraged my recent lesson with Bob to illustrate a better picture of what had really taken place. He showed me that Bob and I would never have even known one another had I not taken it upon myself to say something to him when he first crossed my path. He also managed to show me that it took focusing my time and energy on Bob each time I saw him helped make it safe for Bob to engage and want to get to know me as well. My unique questions allowed me to get a further glimpse into the world of Bob each time we met and every question answered became a new connection and dialogue jumping off point. Although along the way I had learned Bob was a successful business owner, I never allowed my own professional interests to pollute my engagement with Bob and hence why he trusted me when the time came to help him.

Everything that J said to me made sense. Like coming out of a fog I remarked to J, "It wasn't dumb luck at all. No, it was as if a plan was meticulously carved out for Bob and I and I simply played my part." My analogy was met with prideful acknowledgment. J raised his hand to give a high five and my hand instantly raised up to meet his.

"Business will come to you my boy," J said as we slapped hands. "But not because you have a strategy or a plan to make it so. No, it will come to you because when you are genuinely interested in helping people and being a resource to them, good things are returned to you. And you only get the chance when you reach out to make a....."

We both said the word connection in perfect harmony.

The seeds of my own Ripple Effect were not only planted but were beginning to take root.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 6

The five minute drive over to the Starbucks passed without much substantive conversation. We made idle chit chat; more my talking more as a result of my nervousness and I suppose in a desperate attempt to apologize for my unloading, so to speak, minutes earlier. J was accommodating, allowing me to calm my nerves by babbling on about the weather, birds, traffic and a sundry of really mindless subjects.

After I insisted on paying for our new cups of coffee we made our way over to the table and sat down. “I want to revisit something you said earlier,” he said. My nervousness instantly returned. I felt like a little boy sitting in front of the principal. “Why do you think your business is in trouble?”

“Well we need more customers. Simple as that really,” I responded. Sounded simple – in fact still sounds simple recalling it all these years later.

“You know in the brief time that I have known you, I had no idea that you owned a company. Did you know that?” It was a question that was asked but it was obvious it wasn’t supposed to be answered. “Think about all the people you have met these past few weeks. How many of them work for all sorts of companies and all the while you never shared with anyone you owned a company did you? An impressive one I might add from the looks of your office.” He smiled because he could see the pride welling up inside of me.

“Now don’t get me wrong. Most people could care less what you do.” My smile instantly vanished. “You see most people are so caught up in their own craziness that they rarely look beyond themselves to see others. Yet in these few weeks you have managed to do that. You have learned to focus. You have learned to be aware. You have learned that a well placed question at the right moment can tell you more about a person than you ever imagined. Their hopes and dreams. What they are truly passionate about. Tell me I am wrong,” he said defiantly. “Tell me about who you’ve met since our first encounter.”

My mind scrabbled. There had been so many. Madge of course! There were multiple entrepreneurs such as myself. There were teachers, crossing guards, insurance salesmen, ad executives, salespeople of all sorts. I had met mothers and sons, fathers and sons. He just sat there looking like Garfield the cat after a bowl of lasagna. As my mind wandered and I gave him names and details about this person and that person my heart began to pound. I really had met a log of people from all walks of life. Some that surely would be interested in what I had to offer and others that were just plain neat to know- even if it was for a few minutes.

“Boy you have discovered something that most people wait a lifetime to discover and even then so many never do. You my friend found a way to make a connection. You found a way to make a momentary impact on the people you met each time you did it. You brought them out of their myopicism and made them wake up and pay attention – maybe for the first time in a long time. You did this. You didn’t even realize you were doing it did you?” I sat there dumbfounded. “You did it and never pushed yourself on anyone. You didn’t say 'hey look at me and what I do.' You simply connected for the sake of connecting and it felt good didn’t it?”

It had felt incredible admittedly though the true depth of what I had done and what I had apparently learned didn’t actually sink in until that very moment. A smile broke out all over my face. “You connected with people that will remember you. Heck in the time we have just been sitting here you have had more people say good morning to you than they have me.” It was true. “But you still have more to learn my friend. Connecting is just the first step. Making a more relevant and permanent impact is the bigger opportunity.”

“Bigger opportunity,” I sheepishly asked.

“Yes.” He reached over and put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed. Memories of those special at-a-boy moments with my dad or favorite teachers came rushing back. “You can’t make the kind of impact that you are destined to make locked away in some dark office my boy. The people are out here,” he said gesturing around Starbucks. “And out there,” he pointed out towards the street which I understood to mean the world.

“That is great J and I appreciate that, I really do. But how on Earth can this help me with my business,” I asked him.

“Let’s just save that for tomorrow shall we?”

With that he said good morning to a young couple that had settled in two tables over.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 5

I had been under enormous pressure at work. Our company, a start-up at the time, was losing cash, what little of it we had and losing it fast. Six months earlier, I had been living high on the hog as one of the nation's most recognizable young talents in the Xerox agency stable. Now, having left Xerox, I was trying to start another company in the same industry but without the same outdated approach Xerox insisted I subscribe to. We were making headway, slowly but not fast enough.

(I had driven past the Starbucks several mornings in a row now, insisting that my time would be better spent figuring out how to right my struggling ship. No time for coffee chit-chat when I needed to most be spending my time figuring out how to motivate my team and find more sales. At least that was what I would tell myself. The pang in my heart still shot through me each morning as I tried to ignore the urge to turn into the driveway that led to Starbucks. I felt alone and scared about my future and would have given my hind teeth to see a friend like J for a little pick me up convo (a Steveism by the way), but I insisted on heading into the office, long before anyone else, so I could resume my stressing. As if looking at papers in a dark office was going to help right?

It had been at least two weeks since Madge and I had last seen each other. We ended up having several delightful conversations and expanding our range of acquaintances at that Starbucks - jointly introducing on another to strangers became sort of our game. Game or not, we had met a lot of fun and interesting people. At last we met, she was headed to Colorado and then maybe over to California to a spa she had read about in a magazine. All the while, still no word or sign of J anywhere.

Then one day it happened. I was at the office very early one morning when there was a tap on the front door. Given that it was dark outside and still very early, I nearly peed my pants when the tap occurred; it scared me to death. I had one of those Fred Sanford moments - you know "They're coming for me Weezy!" (Sanford and Sons television program from the seventies for my younger readers). I peeked around the corner of my office out into the lobby and there with his big muggy grin stood my old friend J. He was holding two to-go cups of Starbucks coffee.

We sat down in my office and he proceeded to chew me out for making him hunt me down. I thought some nerve, you are the one that up and disappeared but I said nothing and held my tongue. "What's going on with you Steve? You were making such fine progress." His tone was filled with both caring and disappointment.

I shared with him my work dilemma and the fact my company was on the precipice of possibly not making it. I whined on and on for what seemed like an eternity about making the wrong moves at the wrong time, under capitalization and a stress level of having to get more sales if we were ever going to make payroll, let alone survive period. He listened intently and the look on his face showed he felt my pain. He understood and seemed to empathize with my plight.

"The secret to your success is right in front of your face you know?" A momentary flash went through my my mind - maybe J is a rich investor looking for a promising company to invest in. I smiled and he smiled back. "No, I am not a rich investor unfortunately otherwise I would be investing in you my boy in a flash." A stunned look crossed my face. He was a mind reader.

"The secret is very simple and you have been uncovering it since you and I first met," he said as he took a long sip of his coffee.

The moment passed like molasses. I nearly screamed, "What secret? What on Earth do you mean J?" All of a sudden my polite, unassuming manner turned angry. I was dealing with real world problems here - maybe not on order of world importance but pretty damn significant to my world. I was tired of games. I was tired of quippy anecdotes and talking in circles. I didn't give him time to answer. I just fired off, "I've met you, Madge and a bunch of people. Great people all of you but honestly don't see how any of you can help my situation. I don't see the relevance of how just sitting down and chatting with someone can fix what for me, is so obviously broken."

He simply sat there....smiling. He sipped his coffee and when it was obvious I had finally gotten all that I needed to say out, he said, "People Steve. It's your ability to connect with people. That's the secret you have been missing all these years. It's the secret that can and will help you get whatever it is that you want. My coffee is a little cold. Why don't we go get a warm up."

With that, he was up and halfway out the door. I simply followed.

__________________________

To my readers, thank you to each of you for such amazing emails and phone conversations this past week. This series has drawn out a bit and I was worried that some of you might have a problem with that. As I near the end of its completion I hope that you will be patient with me a few more days as I finish up. My posts this week may be a little hap-hazard as I am traveling to Las Vegas to do a speech and a Ripple for a delightful company. Please be patient with me as I will get this series wrapped up as time allows.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 4

Nothing. It had been four days since "J" had sent that note under my muffin and still nothing. I dutifully showed up to that Starbucks each morning in hopes of reconnecting with my new friend but he was no where to be found. I peppered the now familiar baristas with questions of his whereabouts but if they knew anything, they weren't telling. I even went so far as to bribe Tammy, the cashier, with five bucks to spill the beans, so to speak, as to who the guy was. She held firm but took my money and quickly put it in the tip jar with both a smile and a wink.

His note haunted me. What took me so long? What could he possibly mean by that? I pondered with labored effort to grasp some understanding but the statement was lost on me. I took out my laptop and typed those words into the Word document I had started that very first day that I had met him. People. What took me so long? Then suddenly it hit me. The first thing that popped into my head was the word time and then the word focus just seemed to magically appear out of no where. I quickly typed the two words into my document. I felt like Sherlock Holmes all of a sudden, discovering a clue that would lead me ever closer to solving a mystery; my mystery.

I sat there and let a sense of real accomplishment perk to the surface when suddenly there was a tiny tap on my shoulder. Still focused on what I had just written, I made the mental assumption before ever turning around that the shoulder tapper would no doubt be J. He was there to relish in my word discovery. I turned and before I ever looked I said, "You meant taking the time to focus didn't you?" My huge sappy grin was replaced with absolute embarrassment when I realized there standing behind me was not J but a little old lady clutching a purse and a cup of coffee.

"Oh I am so sorry. I thought you were someone else," I said.

"Oh dear boy, don't be silly. You are obviously excited about something. I hate to disturb you when you have such important work," she said.

"No Mame, you are not disturbing me the least bit. I just figured something out is all."

"You sure did Steve." She smiled as the fact she knew my name flew right over my head. "In fact, that's exactly why J asked me to stop in this morning. He just knew you were going to figure something out today." My heart stopped. You know J I thought to myself.

With those words she introduced herself as Madge, set her belongings down on the table, pulled a chair very close to me and sat down. It seemed my new friend Madge was a long-time friend of J's. She claimed to have met him in a very similar way as to how our paths crossed; at a Starbucks wouldn't you know. It seems Madge was a lonely widow that rarely got out of the house. No family nearby and aside from the occasional trip to the bank and the grocery she seldom set foot outside her front door. That was until they built a Starbucks near her house. Relishing the chance to be out amongst the living, she ventured out nearly every day, enjoyed some coffee and a roll now and then and just enjoyed watching the people. That was until one fateful day when she met J.

It seems our good friend J gets around and on the day his path crossed with Madge's, he was already certain they would not only talk but would become good friends, in fact he insisted on it. "You know the kind of friends like he is with you," she said somewhat apologetically. I assumed her comment was meant to insure that their friendship couldn't be misconstrued as anything more. She was sweet and so incredibly put together, I found myself increasing drawn to her.

"You see until I met J, I wasn't really living. I wasn't really doing much of anything, except maybe waiting to die," she chuckled. "But something drew me to that Starbucks and kept me coming back day after day until at last I met our friend." A big smile appeared on her face. She looked off into space for a moment and seemed to momentarily relive their first meeting. "He saved my life don'tcha know."

It seems that J appeared out of no where, much like he did with me. Though he claimed he wasn't hiding, she just wasn't ready to meet him just yet. So he waited. Patiently. Quitely. Waited for that moment when she was ready and then he came to her. She told the story as if she and I had walked on the same path together. I related to her story in so many ways and felt a twinge of appreciation and honor that J had somehow chosen us both to talk to.

"J and I had a number of great coffee chats and he was the one that opened my eyes."

"Opened your eyes," I asked with a subtle confusion.

"Yes he opened my eyes to a lot of things but people most of all." She took a long pause and reached for my hand. Her pale fragile skin felt warm and safe - it reminded me of my own grandmother's hand. A pang in heart shot through me like an electric shock. She looked into my eyes, intent on insuring I heard and felt what she was about to say to me. "He showed me that people are stories waiting to be told. You just have to be willing to take the time, give your focus and ask the right questions. If you do that a world of possibilities will open up to you."

The words hung there like mystical stars lighting my mental darkness for the first time. She squeezed my hand and said, "You get it Steve. More than you know." She gave me a big smile and patted my knee as I grappled with the story she just told me.

"Yes sir, J saved my life. He reminded me that I could either be a spectator of it or an active player in it. And like you, he started showing me how to get into the game."

There was no doubt J had come into both of our lives for a reason. As Madge and I chit chatted about what we had both learned and how many great people we had already both met along the way, I just hoped I could find that reason out sooner, rather than later.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 3

Over the next several days I arrived extra early and waited for my new friend to arrive. I found myself unable to concentrate, defaulting to nervously watching the door each time it opened hoping to see his smiling face walk through it. Each time I found myself a little more disappointed.

Where had he gone? I went through our last meeting over and over again, each time my heart sinking at my bad manners. Had my not asking him his name really offended him that much? Spending the time I had with him I assumed not, but then again where in the world was he? It was a question I begged to ask but there was no one there to answer. My coffee cup proving, each of those mornings, that it was neither fortune teller nor magic eight ball. His absence remained a mystery.

Each day I found a way to pass the time by concentrating a little more on each face that came through the door. Looking back there must have been hundreds; it was after all a very busy Starbucks. I found myself asking the mental question of whether this person might know him or that person might know him, over and over again. I sat for long periods of time slowly sipping my coffee and just watching. My eyes more than once meeting someone else's, only this time, rather thank looking away as I might have before, I kept the contact and smiled. To which many smiles were returned. I learned that from him.

Three days had passed and still no sign of my new friend but somehow on the fourth morning, I didn't pay it any mind. Four days had passed and many of the strange faces now looked oddly familiar to me, a bounty no doubt from days of just watching, observing. Smiles were exchanged as if old friends were seeing each other after a long break. 'Good mornings and how are you doing this mornings' were exchanged. People took a pause from their morning ritual of hustle and bustle to stop and chat; something that no longer felt awkward and unusual...but simply right. It would be hard to explain but these people somehow made me feel more alive.

I was knee deep in conversation with a fascinating chap named Bob, an insurance salesman who was about to embark on a lifelong dream of going to Italy when it happened. One of the Starbucks baristas tapped me on my shoulder, mid sentence, and offered me a blueberry muffin. At first I was confused, having not ordered a muffin I assumed he had somehow mistakenly brought me someone else's order. He insisted it was mine and handed me the plate. Neatly tucked under my muffin was a folded up piece of paper.

Bob, glancing down at his watch, politely excused himself; he was late for a meeting. We shook hands as new friends do and he promised to fill me on his trip when he got back. He left me looking still rather dumbfounded with muffin in one hand, a note in the other and now all of the baristas smiling at me from behind the counter. Embarrassed, I gathered my composure, sat down and opened the note. It read:

Hey my friend! Have you missed me? I have been very busy this week and unable to make our morning chats. My friends behind the counter tell me that you've made good use of your time however. I look forward to hearing all about it, next time we meet. Until then, I ask you to think about this. What took you so long?

Your Friend and Java Buddy,

J

J? So J was his name? I smiled and took a bite of my muffin and saluted the folks behind the counter that were so obviously in J's plot to surprise me that morning. As I enjoyed the last remnants of my coffee and my yummy muffin, I thought about his question.

What on Earth did he mean by, "What took you so long?"

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 2

He had said I wasn't ready and his words just hung there in the think coffee aroma filled air. I didn't say anything, though the curiosity pounded beneath my heart and threatened to leap forth and demand him to tell me what he meant. He sat back in his chair and just let the moment sink in I now suspect. He sipped on his coffee and smiled at another person that had sat down two tables over.

Still puzzling over his comment, I noticed that he was literally having yet another conversation with a young lady and her teenage son, transitioning from me to them with perfect ease. He was asking her questions and making her smile and was even getting a few grins from her teenage son. I watched him without really realizing I was watching him. The way his easy going way seemed to attract other peoples' eye. Even people that were just fixing their coffee with sugar and creamer somehow seemed to be drawn to him and seemed to eavesdrop on what he had to say. I remember thinking this guy must know everyone here but almost immediately I sensed that wasn't the case. These people were strangers to him, at least until that day he decided they weren't.

As I sat there and watched and became lost in my own thoughts, his hand appeared on my shoulder and he said, "This is my friend...um sorry friend, I didn't catch your name," his eyes and the eyes of the woman and her son firmly fixed on me now.

"Ummm, my name is Steve," I sheepishly murmured and offered what had to be a confused smile.

"Oh that's right, it's Steve," he said as if I had told him and he had forgotten. Though I can't honestly say that I had. His attention now returned to the young mother, "Steve and I were just talking about how many fascinating people come through that door." Her attention turned to the door and the growing line.

"I guess I never thought about that," she replied.

"Oh you betcha. So many people with so many stories. I find it quite simply fascinating." Both her and her son now seemed to join us and watch the endless stream of people coming and going. A mutual sense of appreciation for this odd man's observation seemed to settle over us when he chimed in, "So tell me what inspires you young man."

The teenager looked shocked at such a crazy question. His teenage bravado rose to the surface like a pot coming to a boil and then like a magic spell had been cast his expression suddenly changed and he blurted out "art!" The man asked him what kind of art and as if the starter's gun had signaled the beginning of the race, the young man proceeded to tell us all about his love for drawing and the artists he was currently studying and hoping one day to emulate. He spoke for what had to be nearly five minutes straight with nary a breath taken, his proud mom looking adoringly on the whole time.

I watched as age was transcended and replaced with enthusiastic interaction. There wasn't an age gap between my new friend and this teenager, just good conversation. I found myself pulled squarely into this kid's passion despite knowing little about art myself. The old man however, seemed to know a good bit about the subject and asked the boy question after question which he enthusiastically answered until his mom interrupted with a polite reminder he still had school and she had work. I remember being disappointed as I was thoroughly enjoying the back and forth.

We all stood up and exchanged handshakes all around. "You two have a wonderful day. Don't forget to stop and enjoy it you hear?" They both smiled and shook their heads. "Good luck with your art my friend," he said to the young man, gripping his hand and patting him on the back. "I expect the next time we meet you will show me some of your drawings yes?" The kid looked as if he was about to explode with appreciation and excitement; a look I was amazed by, given the cool bravado he had shown just minutes earlier. With that they left and we returned to our two seats.

"You really got that kid going," I said as both a comment and question.

"Ah I didn't do much. Just asked the right questions. He did all the heavy lifting," he smiled and snorted with a look of real satisfaction. "You will be amazed at what simple, unassuming questions can reveal about someone if you just have the courage to take a chance and ask." With that he got up from the table and said, "You will learn. See you soon."

We exchanged handshakes and with that he was gone. A horrible feeling washed over me as I realized I had failed to get his name. A sense of panic set in at the total lack of manners and I immediately got up from my table, grabbed my stuff and rushed out to the parking lot to find him. But he was gone.

I hoped 'see you soon' meant tomorrow.

How I Became a Starbucks Stalker - Pt. 1

About ten years ago now (gosh that long ago?), I found myself sipping on a pipping cup of dark roasted coffee and pounding away on my keyboard. I was in my typical zone of getting work done before actually going into the office and doing some more work. I had found that Starbucks opened early and I could arrive promptly at 5:30AM and grab a cup and work in relative comfort and privacy and as I settled in to tackle that morning's project, my perspective was about to be altered just slightly.

I was knee deep in crafting a new sales strategy for my team when a kindly older gentleman sat down at the table next to mine. I looked up ever so briefly, made eye contact and smiled. A favor he returned as he unbuttoned his jacket and settled in to enjoy his morning coffee. A few moments passed and the buzz and noise level began to rise within the store because more people were filing in and grabbing their jolt of java. I looked up from my laptop to survey the scenery and he must have noticed and he let out a sort of half chuckle. I looked over at face filled with amusement and a smirk that told a story - though at the time I didn't have the foggiest idea what that story might be.

"Look at 'em. Everyone is in such a damn hurry to grab their coffee and get to where ever they need to be going. Sort of sad don't you think?" My attention now squarely focused on him and the look on my face must have noted my confusion in his comment so he clarified. "People. I mean the people in line. Look at them." I did. "Everyone is so antsy and so focused. They all look the same but are so different too. And no one is talking to one another, did you notice that?" I hadn't before but now, as if discovering some rare trinket of treasure, my eyes shot wide open at what his observation unveiled to me. No one was talking. Heck no one was even smiling. It was sad. I remember that feeling wash over me to this day.

It was one of those moments where I could have easily dismissed this complete stranger's ramblings and decided that no work would be possible with chatty Kathy (no offense to any Kathy's out there -- mine especially) sitting next to me and packed up right then and there. But for some odd reason I didn't. In fact I just sat there. A minute passed by, then two, then three. I have no idea how long we both sat there fixed on the endless parade of people coming in and out of the door.

Being a people watcher I have always enjoyed watching people at airports and malls and places like that but before that fateful day, I had never thought about doing it at a Starbucks. I was an entranced when suddenly I realized the old guy was now in full conversation with someone at the next table. They chatted like old friends, which at the time was what I assumed they were. As they continued their conversation I opened up a new word document on my laptop and typed the word - People. I had no idea what it meant at the time as I my eyes darted between the black lettering, the blinking cursor and yet more new faces each minute coming in and out of the Starbucks door.

"Sorry about that. Made a new friend. Two actually," the old man said leaning closer to my table.

"Oh no big deal. New friends? I figured that was someone you already knew," I said.

"Nope. Just met them today. A husband and wife that come here every morning. They share a car into work. Fascinating people."

"Fascinating people? How do you know that if you don't know them," I asked sort of annoyed at his insistence that they were new friends but so obviously not.

"My boy almost everyone I meet at a Starbucks is fascinating. They all have a story and so desperately want to tell it and will...all you have to do is ask."

It seems my new friend has no problem starting a conversation with just about anyone who walks by his table. Despite going to that same location for a while, I had never seen this man before but he insisted that he had been there every day and I had simply failed to notice him. My mind was atwitter thinking back at the many early mornings I had been there wondering if he even looked familiar. Nothing.

"Easy tiger, don't strain something. We haven't met until today because you weren't ready." With that my new friend leaned back to his table, took a long sip of coffee and smiled at me.

Ready for what I wondered.

Remember To Soak It In

My dad is visiting us from Albuquerque this week. That means lots and lots of fishing! So far on our two limited outings dad hasn't done nearly as well as we had hoped. In fact yesterday, Josh my almost five year old, put us all to shame out-catching us all with a little Nemo pool. Sad.

I don't know how many times I caught myself this weekend, but it was more than a few, just watching my dad. It's as if my brain was on auto-camera mode trying its best to capture his looks when he did (finally) catch something or how he reacted to watching both Zach and Josh on the boat. His smiles. His laughs. Those moments I don't get nearly enough of because we see each other so little these days. Also sad.

It is times like these that I am reminded that I just need to stop and soak it in. Dad is getting older and I know he won't always be around and that hurts my heart so much that I can't breath when I think about it. I know his day to day life caring full-time for my mom who is in the late stages of Alzheimer's is taking a toll on him and it's trips out here that help to recharge his batteries a bit. It's his visits that do the same for me.

Moments are so fickle. They come and go so quickly that we often take them for granted and rarely appreciate them for the true gifts that they are. It's hard to remember to stop and take a breath and soak it in, but we must.

So my Ripple friends, whether you are spending time with you aging parents, hanging out with you kids, holding hands with your better half or simply having coffee with a good friend, remember to stop and soak it in. That mental snap-shot of time will be a gift you will treasure for years to come.

Ripple On!!!