Loquacious Introvert

Most of you know that I enjoy the reputation as the Starbucks Stalker as I am not afraid to strike up a conversation with just about anyone. I truly love the variety that Starbucks offers as I can think of no other company that provides us all with such a rich selection of opportunities to reach out and connect. Think about it. Your local Starbucks attracts people from all walks of life with an unbelievable array of backgrounds, education and professional experience and the conversation and connection possibilities are truly endless.

Secretly I like to think that Starbucks creates all of these "hot spots of connection" just for me to get my people fix. I know that is likely not the case but let a fella fantasize won't you?

Most of you that are regular readers of my BLOG likely recall that my dad lives in Albuquerque. He has truly become my best little walking press agent for my book, my Ripple training and ultimately my desire to reach outside the box and connect. So much so that he now goes to Starbucks and the other "local" coffee shops I think more than I do in a week and often finds an ear to bend about this thing I call Rippling. He's a proud papa indeed! I know these little jaunts up to coffee house gives him a great break from taking care of my mom and allows him to be an observer and often, in his own and very inspiring way, a conversation stalker

Well it seems dad and I may have some conversation competition at the old Starbucks! As my dad told me the story, he was sitting in a Starbucks a few weeks ago when he noticed an elderly man spring through the front door of Starbucks. He sashayed up to the old counter and plunked down the exact change for his black coffee and then proceeded to scan the shop. My dad noticed he purposefully scanned each and every patron with a keen eye and then with coffee in hand and a smile on his face he proceeded to engage each and every one of them.

He commented here and there about how busy everyone was. He interrupted two students embroiled in a study debate and asked about their day. With answer in hand he greeted a young lady listening to an IPOD and refused to let her recoil into independence alley until she removed her head phones to acknowledge him. He asked what people were working so diligently on laptops and asked about the books that people were reading, he was making it his mission to engage the world; to change the world with a smile and genuine interest in everyone. To hear my dad tell it, he was accomplishing his mission as he left each person somehow forever altered and better than they had been just minutes before.

Then he came to my dad who had watched with much amusement and observation. "Even you my fine sir, you have your nose stuck in a book. What are we reading" he asked. What are we reading? I love that! Talk about a great way to start a conversation!!!

My dad is 72 mind you and looks great for his age but could never be mistaken for a spring chicken. But as this man pulled up a chair the mildly humorous comment of "all you kids are so busy with your books and laptops" that came from this incredibly engaging man was both funny and insightful. You see this man, it turns out, is 92.

He like my father has a wife at home with Alzheimer's. His days are filled with going to Starbucks, the grocery store any other place he could possibly engage one in conversation. I am certain, like my dad, he uses the experiences he has with the people he meets to share with his beloved when he returns home. A recap of conversation bounty that they can both share even if it is just him telling the tale to her. You can almost see that scene can't you?

As he sat there and visited with my dad, they found many "connection points." He challenged my dad by informing him he had participated in four wars and asked if he could guess which ones they had been (three were actual well know wars and one was never officially constituted as a war but don't tell this man that!). They talked about the Alzheimer's and their deep love to care for their two wives. Two men from two different generations and in fact two complete strangers...connecting, sharing and and reminding us all that that is what life is all about.

He talked with the speed and vigor of a man more my age. Their brief interaction covered a myriad of topics and just as soon as it had begun it was over. With the flip of his card on the table he said he would look for my dad again but he had errands to attend to and people to see. He sprang to his feet, turned and was gone.

There on the table at Starbucks my dad picked up his card realizing that he had given this man his name and asked for his but somehow in the gust of conversation the man had never obliged. He closely examined the card and realized he had just met.....

Sir. Duke Wellington
Loquacious Introvert

At 92 and 72, if these guys can reach outside to connect, don't you think you and I can too?

Ripple On and go stalk up a conversation at Starbucks today! If you see the Duke say hello from the Ripple Guy!

Steve

Ripple Connection Question of the Week

My readership has just exploded over the last few weeks so I wanted to take this opportunity to quickly explain to those of you who are new to my BLOG what the Ripple Connection question is and how to use it.

I believe that every day we have people who come into our life for a defined purpose. I also believe that we as a society have lost our ability to reach out and connect. We are too myopic and often oblivious to the opportunities which are right in front of us. I also believe that those of us that want to connect with others are often afraid or unsure of exactly how to bridge a connection with someone. Whether that connection is with people we already know, but want to know better, or simply complete strangers who cross our path in life we may be lacking the tool or resource to start a conversation.

That is why I created the Ripple Connection Questions. These questions are an ideal way to get to know somebody and to hopefully find a common connection point which creates jump off points for future dialogue and increased connection. These questions aren't the maby pamby (one of my favorite sayings) b.s. kind that most people are accustomed to hearing. No! They are by design fun to ask, fun to answer and guaranteed to make the interaction memorable for you both.

So give it a try! What do you have to lose? Not a darn thing! Whether you want to get to know a co-worker better, develop more rapport with your boss or simply engage the complete stranger at Starbucks, the Ripple Connection Questions will get people talking. Most importantly....they will get you noticed and appreciated for being different from the rest of the herd.

Try it....You'll enjoy the experience, the answers and the connections. I promise!

So to this week's Ripple Connection Question:

What is the one question you would most like people to ask you when they first meet you?

Thanks to my friend Matt Homann with realBIGthinking.com for reminding me of this fun and engaging connection question!

Ripple On!!!


Steve Harper

P.S. We still have a few books left from our Dang Those Shippers Sale so if you want to pick up a copy of my book The Ripple Effect cheap and don't mind a little damage to the cover (some of the damage is so slight you won't even notice it) then Ripple on over to my store and pick up a book full of Ripples for a real song! Click here!

How Not to Cater to the Customer

I had made prior arrangements to meet a colleague on Monday afternoon at a local cafe that specializes in gourmet sandwiches, baked goods and of course...coffee! I finished with my lunch appointment early and was excited to get to the cafe early and have about 45 minutes to hammer out some work before my 2PM meeting. I arrived with laptop bag in hand and money to spend to get a jump start on my caffeine fix prior to my meeting.

The cafe wasn't very full and I quickly found a table by a plug (damn computers should have endless batteries!) and started to unpack my laptop. Just then a "hmm hmm" sound appeared from behind me and it was one of the owners with a very disapproving look on his face. He motioned for me to look at the typed up sign that was hanging from the wall which said in no uncertain terms...

"NO LAPTOPS ALLOWED BETWEEN 11-2PM!!!"

I had known this cafe to not offer wireless access between these hours which was fine with me but now this sign indicated that if I was toting a laptop that I wasn't welcome. I sarcastically laughed at the owner and said, "Are you serious? I can't even do some work while I wait for a meeting I have at 2PM....I plan to buy something and know you don't have your wifi enabled until after 2PM."

"You are welcome to stay but your laptop isn't allowed on the table." He curtly turned and walked off to go serve a customer behind the counter.

Now I can empathize with these people who offer wireless access and have people that come in and camp out all day. Table turn is what it's all about in the restaurant world and despite what Starbucks says....it is only concerned with how quickly it can get people in and out of their stores as well (quoted to me by their VP of Marketing in fact) but even they are not as rude as this guy. I could not believe how mater of fact he was about it and this despite nearly half of his cafe being empty!

As I gathered my stuff a table full of business people had noticed the treatment and one guy remarked, "That guys is a *#&* (rhymes with stick)."

"So if you know this why do you come here," I asked him.

"Good question! Why do we come here guys," he asked everyone else at the table.

There were some snide comments about the coffee and sandwiches. Then a young lady spoke up and said to her colleagues, "His wife is a lot nicer but she hardly works the lunch crowd. And besides half the time the stuff we need to talk about is on our laptops so it doesn't make sense we keep coming here. Especially after that," referring to the treatment they had just witnessed.

I won't bore you with the back and forth dialogue but let me just summarize that they all agreed that finding a new place to lunch was a priority for their weekly (yes weekly) executive lunch gathering. Their entire table's business had to be worth at least $ 70-80 given the size and selection of meals spread throughout their table.

In one fell swoop in an attempt to avoid one customer this guy had managed to lose about $ 280 a month in revenue or $ 3,360.00 for the year at in total 12 customers (me included). Not to mention that several other tables seem to be paying pretty rapt attention to what was occurring and I suspect that this now very public debate would influence their future spending dollars as well.

I completely agree it is the business owner's right to make up their own policies and procedures and we as consumers can choose to agree or disagree with them. We ultimately vote with our dollars and that's the way it should be. However, this guy's over the top policy is just plain wrong. It fails to take into account his demographic which is mainly business folks that all tend to have an assortment of laptops and other electronic devices in tow. His policy, especially given the available number of tables, was majoring in the most minor of areas and that's just plain bad. Perhaps his policy was the reason that his cafe was only half full? Who knows but it wouldn't surprise me.

This situation stands as a good reminder to us all. Are your policies or procedures majoring in minor things and working against the support of your customers? If you don't know but suspect that they might, ask! It certainly makes more sense than to just outright lose their business doesn't it?

Ripple On!!!


Steve Harper

The Employee Perspective

Are you a business owner or leader of an organization? If so let me ask you a question.

How valued and appreciated
do your employees feel?

I ask this question because I believe it to be an important one that leaders of any organization or team should be asking themselves on a regular basis. Recent surveys have indicated that over half of all workers are right now looking for another job and would leave their current position if another opportunity became available. Over half! That is a scary prospect if you are in a leadership position.

I know when I owned my own company and had service talent that I had basically paid thousands of dollars to train I constantly worried about a pithy competitor swooping in to take them. I spent many a sleepless night worrying about the potential hit I would take in both the support of my customers and to my bottom line. I had nightmares of my people leaving for a minor increase in their salary or benefits and some evil competitor laughing all the way to the bank as he or she calculated all the dollars they had saved by my training their new employee.

Fortunately the nightmares didn't often come to pass and I believe it was because I said, and said often, two little words that can be more lasting than any raise.

THANK YOU!

Employees want to know that their efforts are recognized and appreciated. All too often, I see organizations that treat their employees like cattle and refer to them as "human capital." Human capital? How about Tom. Bob, Stephanie, Michelle, George...anything but human capital.

I just completed reading Blue Ocean Strategy and wanted to share an excerpt I found particularly interesting about why it is important to share with your employees why you value you them.

"Emotionally, individuals seek recognition of their value, not as "labor," "personnel" or "human resources" but as human beings who are treated with full respect and dignity and appreciated for their individual worth regardless of hierarchical level."

In part I created the Corporate Ripple as a means to show teams and workgroups that they are valued both as individuals and collectively by opening up the channels of dialogue and connection. I truly believe that companies that invest their time, money and resources in helping bring connection and yes, Rippling, into their work environment can positively impact their employees' perception and commitment.

So I challenge you if you are a leader of a company to ask that question. Don't just ask yourself the question but ask the Tom's, Bob's Stephanie's and Michelle's of your company how valued they feel. Really listen to how they answer that question and take notes. And no matter what, follow it up with the two most powerful words in the English language (heck any language)....THANK YOU!

If you can't seem to bring to yourself to ask those questions or are afraid you might not get the straight scoop or hear the answers you want to hear then it might suggest you need someone in there asking for you before it is too late! In today's tough labor market losing core talent can and will cost your organization an unbelievable amount of money and it is so avoidable.

If you have interest in learning about some of the innovative Ripple programs we are putting to work for organizations of all sizes, shoot me an email at steve@ripplecentral.com.

Let's make sure your employees feel valued and appreciated and stay right where they belong!



Ripple On!!!

Steve Harper