Friday, December 14, 2007

Friday Fun - Reindeer Walk Out

Special news bulletin from my crack team of Ripple reports currently stationed in the North Pole with Santa and his crew. It seems today that despite all efforts, negotiations with the Reindeer Coalition of Magic Flyers and The Ho Ho Group dba Santa Claus and The Little Dudes have broken down. This walkout of course couldn't come at a worse time with Christmas Eve just ten days from now.

As first reported last week in Santa's Inside Track weekly newsletter there was a mass walk out by Santa's Reindeer led by Vixen the head of the Reindeer Coalition of Magic Flyers. The first rumblings of trouble were first reported when the reindeer reported for training camp to get ready for the upcoming Christmas season. One reindeer was ominously missing: Rudolph. At the time it was dismissed as a schedule misunderstanding (Rudolph was apparently sitting on a beach in the Bahamas) but various news agencies reported that Rudolph's top Elven Agent, Little Big Ear, was actually trying to shake down jolly old St. Nick for a cut future Christmas profits. Santa finally managed to get Rudolph to training camp by agreeing to pay to have his nose rebrightened and to review his contract at the end of this season. This action reportedly left the other reindeer more than a little annoyed.

If you remember fur was ruffled at the end of the last Christmas season when Rudolph released his controversial book "Just Follow My Damn Nose and I'll Lead You Home You Fur Balls." Despite an early bump in sales and a number of appearances on the late night talk show circuit, book sales trailed off. The book fiasco and other apparent hard feelings were seemingly forgotten by everyone, including the reindeer as they broke camp and moved into the Christmas season. But now it appears...maybe not.

"We want our fair share. This is a team and there is not one reindeer here that is more important than any other," said Vixen as he walked out of the North Pole Complex yesterday evening carrying his sleigh bells; a sign that this walkout might just be permanent.

Doner was reached at home and had this to say, "The old and yes I am going to say it, fat, dude has been riding us and riding us for years. We work hard for our money and we want out respect. You know he kisses Rudolph's red nose every chance he gets but where's our love? Can you tell me that?"

Comet had no comment.

The other reindeer refused to talk to our Ripple reporters as they walked into to the adult reindeer club 10 Points. But according to my inside sources tell me that there is discord on multiple levels and that this action has been a long time coming.

This isn't the first time controversy has struck Santa and his team of reindeer. If you remember just two years ago Blitzen took his name a little too seriously and showed up at the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade Blitzed (see picture). The team pulled together then and showed their support by getting Blitzen into the Cold Mountain Rehab and Treatment Facility and were able to get him detoxed and cleared to fly before that year's Christmas Eve. It was hoped that some of these personality conflicts and other issues could be overcome too with the team coming together but it doesn't look good.

Well boys and girls of Ripple land, I am taking the first flight to the North Pole and see what I can do. It definitely looks like the power of connection amongst this team is needed and though I make no promises, we will see what my eleventh hour attempts can do to avoid what is sure to be a Christmas disaster if we can't get the two parties back to the candy cane conference table.

Stay tuned.....

And Ripple On!!!


P.S. If anyone sees Rudolph, can you tell him to call me as we really need to talk.


PRINCE RAHMAN, msole said...

:o) :o) :o)

Thank you for helping start my Friday with great peels of laughter!

Anonymous said...

Very funny Steve. You should really write some fiction.

Your Favorite Holiday Elf!