Friday, May 11, 2007

Smile & Say Good Morning - Try Not To Get Assualted




Gregg Riley, a friend of mine, sent me the following quote:






"You can never tell what type of impact you may make on another’s life by your actions or lack of action. Sometimes just with a smile on the street to a passing stranger can make a difference we could never imagine."

-Ed Foreman
Former Congressman of both
Texas & New Mexico


Gregg mentioned this quote made him recall a story I had shared with a small business group that I spoke to a few weeks ago. I was attempting to illustrate the point that you have no idea how your Ripple could impact a complete stranger's day when I used an experience that occurred while visiting New York City in late 2004.

Those of you who know me know that no one is exempt from my attention. I have made it a habit of mine to talk to people, especially strangers, whenever the chance arises. No, I am not the annoying dude that will creep you out but I think a good morning or how ya doing can, in my own little way, still hold the possibility of positively impacting someone's day.

During one of my first mornings in Manhattan I stopped at where else? You guessed it....Starbucks! Well on this morning I had purposefully gotten into the city early so that I could navigate my surrounds having never been to New York previously. With the location of my early morning meeting sufficiently scouted, I found a Starbucks that had just opened and figured that since it was shortly after 6AM, I could get some work done on this great book I was writing at the time (you might have heard of it...it's called The Ripple Effect).

As I secured my new fangled crazy sized over priced coffee concoction, I proceed to the cream and sugar station. There stood a women in her mid-forties I would guess stirring in her cream and minding her own business. I set my coffee down and popped the lid and simply said "How ya doing this morning?" with a beaming smile.

Her reaction caught me off guard. Her head whipped up and her eyes suddenly turned to black piercing daggers and I could literally hear the lock, load and get ready to fire mechanism click to launch mode.

"What the hell do you mean by that?" she barked. Hit like I had just taken a sucker punch from Mike Tyson I started to mumble something when she grumbled again, "Five years! Five years I have been coming to this Starbucks. Every fricken morning and no one, and I mean no one has ever asked me how's it was going."

Smoke was noticeably rising from her forehead now. I know I had to momentarily look like a deer in headlights but my quick smart ass-like reflexes kicked in.

"That's a real shame. Makes grabbing your morning coffee kinda suck doesn't it?" I smiled with a veiled look of confidence. I figured now was the time she was gonna go ninja on my ass.

She cracked. This harden tough New Yorker laughed.

"So what's your deal?" she asked with a heavy dose of skepticism.

We stood there for a good five minutes and chatted. We talked about the book I was writing and my introverted nature and hence why I make it a point to say hello to at least three new strangers a day to force me out of my shell. We talked about the impact that a smile and simple hello could have one someone who is so fixated on rushing through their morning to get to a job they can't stand and what it might mean to their day. What does it hurt? The simply act of doing something like saying hello hurts no one and likely helps everyone; though undoubtedly in New York they may look at you like you just stole something.

As we parted company I said try it and see what kind of reactions you get. If nothing else you will know that you have done your part to Ripple even if others don't. Worse case it will change your state and what could be wrong with that I asked her.

The following day I again found myself at Starbucks early. I was pounding away on my laptop when I saw her enter. She bee lined it for the counter and rather than just placing her order she asked the cashier, "So how are you doing this morning?" He gave a familar look of confusion but responded politely.

I noticed that she smiled at several people who didn't bother to return the gesture. She didn't seem to care. She was different. She had a different vibe about her from the day before.

She noticed me and came right over. "Hey Texas Ripple, what's shakin?"

"Not much....still working on the book."

"I just have to tell you that this Ripple stuff works. I was suspicious of trying your approach but none-the-less did it yesterday and you know what?"

"What's that?" I asked.

"I did make a difference yesterday even if it was just in my own mind. It felt good. People I work with thought I was nuts but that's okay. I predict your book will sell well. Maybe not so much in New York but around."

We both laughed. It was without a doubt the highlight from my first trip to New York. I could kick myself that I didn't somehow have the forethought to ask her for a card or to give her one of mine. Oh well, New York is a small city and I will be back. Quit the laughing!

My question to you as you read this is how hard is it for you to say hello and smile at three random strangers each day? You don't have to engage in deep meaningful conversation to accomplish something big. In fact the smallest of efforts is often that which moves the largest of mountains. Who said that? Oh I just did. Cool eh?

If nothing else, you could at least look at this like our own personal inside joke and each time you do it chalk it up to another crazy Harper Ripple and pretend we are both basking in the glory of your efforts. Well there is no pretending on my end...I will be basking enough for us both.

Thanks Gregg for sharing the quote!

Ripple On!!!


Steve Harper

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Loved that story! I was grinning from ear to ear from the point where you "cracked her tough exterior" until the end. You might just yet convince me to brush off the introvert and give it a try myself.

Martin Lindsey said...

Funny story Steve and regionally very accurate. I'm from the midwestern (as opposed to the southern) half of Missouri and when I first came to the state of Alabama in my college years it was refreshing to see strangers speaking to each other all the time as a matter of courtesy.

I had to learn to change gears every time I went home to St. Louis on breaks though because every body at home looked at me like I was a space alien when I spoke to them and they didn't know me from Adam or Eve.

Those "going ninja" and "lock and load" analogies were really funny because I remember the same looks.

Good stuff man. Doing my part to ripple on a daily basis!

Martin

Anonymous said...

Steve - I love the story - and I do it all the time. It has become a game with me because the more crabby the look the more challenge to me. I have only had it backfire a couple of times. And, it is great to watch a face soften and spread into a grin!