Monday, June 12, 2006

Ripple Your Words

“We cannot rise higher than our thought of ourselves.”

-- Orison Swett Marden

Recently I was having a conversation with a good friend of mine who has taken on the role of mentor for me. Actually she is one of many mentors that I am lucky to have at the moment. I think we all need these and I encourage you, if you don't have an official mentor(s), to go find one quick! Don't to the nearest mentor store and beg, borrow or steal one because they are worth their weight in gold let me tell you.

I will try and write more on mentors and how to find and attract one in a later post. If you can't wait, email me and we will chat offline.

My mentor is a brilliant person and someone that I trust. She has always been dead on with her advice and suggestions. Most recently however, she pointed out the limiting use of words that I tend to interlace throughout my vocabulary. It was a profound observation and one that I discovered was holding me back in a number of ways.

I would be telling a story or revealing an intention to make something happen and I would always say something like "I am going to try and get that appointment" or " I will try and make that appointment." Try being the operative limiting word. Try leaves too much vagueness. As YODA said..."there is no TRY, only DO!"

She also pointed out my use of the word problem as I revealed a particular challenge I am facing. I would say something like "the problem is he or she won't call me back" or "the problem is I simply don't have time." The problem with the problems I would be describing was they were more or less challenges, not problems. However, as my mentor pointed out, when I put the negative emphasis on whatever the circumstance happened to be, I made it bigger than it had to be.

My mentor's comments really hit home and make a lot of sense. We define ourselves when communicating with others by the words we choose to use. I had no idea that many of the things that I said were limiting words and actually gave off a lack of confidence, fear or mistrust which effects the impressions we give to those we talk to. When she pointed this out it was eye opening because those words aren't used in habit, I can assure you. They are used because I hadn't yet convinced myself I could or would accomplish what I was talking about.

As the quote above says, we cannot rise higher than the thought of ourselves. If we have fear in something words like can't, try, problem, only if, someday, hope to, maybe when, etc. start to permeate our thinking and ultimately destroy our self-confidence.

Can words make a difference? They sure can and they do. Challenge yourself for one week to try and eliminate the negative vocabulary you use. Replace it with more powerful, inspiring language and see if your mind and your thoughts don't make a radical shift.

Can't --- Can and will
Problem --- Challenge
Try --- Do
Someday --- Today
Maybe --- Yes
Won't --- Will

Thanks to my mentor and good friend for pointing out something that has been holding me back for a long time but no longer will!

Ripple On!!!


1 comment:

Asha said...

I agree that words are powerful, they create our reality. What you believe and say to yourself is what occurs for you in all realms of your life. The language we use is self limiting as well as limiting to others at times. Taking responsibility of the words we use is a great exercise to practice. I am sure you will see the difference. Great post Steve!